Welcome back to “New Man, New Woman, New Week.” I am fired up to be with you today, and here’s what we’re gonna talk about. See, and the reason we’re gonna talk about this topic is because I’ve received countless emails. How do you have a personal relationship and a business relationship? Or how do you reconnect for a business relationship with somebody who you’ve had a long-term gap in your personal relationship? We’ve had so many emails. It’s been asked many different ways, but the context is really the same. That’s the center. How do you have the personal and business relationship or to reconnect the two? It makes me think of a story.
About nine years ago, I was running a college internship program for a Fortune 100 financial firm, and one of the interns walked into a meeting. And the intern says, “Oh my gosh, I re-contacted an individual that I went to high school with, and we had this hour-long conversation catching up, and it was awesome!”
And I got to hear her story and what was going on in her life, and it had been like five years since they’d talked.
And then she gets to the end of the story, and her attitude changed.
She said, “After an hour of talking, I then said to her, ‘Hey, I’m really excited about my internship, and I would love to sit down and talk with you about some of the things that I’m doing,’” and as soon as she made that statement, believe it or not, this long-term friend, it had been five years, hung up the phone.
That’s what I asked her.
She was so upset, almost devastated.
I said why do you think she hung up the phone?
And she said, “I think it was because after an hour of catching up, after all these years, she realized the only reason I was contacting her was for business.”
Now see, this has happened to all of us hasn’t it? It happens on LinkedIn, it happens on Facebook.
People reach out to us, and you know they’re only reaching out for business purposes, yet they try to give this personal spin to it, and then they come out from the curtain and it’s like, Hey! Right?
Here’s the magic key, the magic principle.
You can rekindle any relationship, no matter how long it’s been, as long as you lead with the real intentions first.
So if you think of somebody for a business reason and it’s an old personal relationship, the way to bridge that gap, real intentions. So when you reach out to them, you call them, you send them a LinkedIn message; you send them an email, whatever it might be. Let them know, “Hey I wanted to let you know I thought of you for business reasons. It just so happens that I am now running a business and helping people that are doing what you’re doing, and I’m really proud of you.” And the second reason for reaching out, “I can’t believe it’s been ten years since we connected.” And even if you already have these things taken care of from a business perspective, it will be really great to reconnect.
So what I was able to do was to reframe what was really a tough story to hear from this young gal that was referring back to this friend and this tough, tough relationship she had reconnecting and then hearing that tough story.
But really for you, what is our learning for it?
How do you rekindle those relationships? Real intentions. That’s it.
It’s pretty easy. And here’s what happens. Here’s what I’ve found, the response that you get. People can’t believe the truth that you’re bringing to that relationship. People appreciate the fact that you are being honest with them, and that enables you, no matter how long the period of time since you’ve had that relationship, it allows you to reconnect for the right reasons. So even if you don’t do any business, I can tell you, I’ve had that happen where we didn’t do any business but reconnecting, hearing those stories again, going back to old memories is so fun, and it goes back to a principle that we’ve shared in so many of our videos.
Don’t try to control the result, just have passion for the process of what you do. Lead with real intentions.
So back to the start of our video.
How do you have the personal and the business?
- Real intentions.
- Be truthful.
- Be forward.
If you’re contacting somebody for business purposes, lead with business. If you’re only leading for personal, lead with personal! But lead with real intentions.
I want you to have the opportunity to have amazing relationships in your life, whether it’s with business or whether it’s personal. That’s an easy concept that I know will work for you. So if you’re out there, the ones who have been sending the questions, I hope you got your answer. Continue to follow us on Twitter @ContinuedFight. Send those questions my way. I want to answer them. I want to connect with you so that your needs are getting met. Go have fun. Drive those real intentions to build real relationships.
Until next Monday and you know I get fired up to be with you for “New Man, New Woman, New Week,” go do great things.
This episode of Greatness in YOUR Relationships!! Episode 14 Volume 1 can also be found on Youtube.